My passion for writing only happened a few years ago. I had never written anything professionally before, however that soon changed the day my path crossed with the man I believe to be my twin soulmate. This encounter changed my life.
For the first few years I didn’t know he was my twin soulmate; I had never even heard of the word until a medium I visited told me about it. I had already started on my spiritual path. I’d learnt how to read the tarot & angel cards, and I was having fun with it; even making a little money. However, when I met my twin my spiritual journey escalated. My connection with my guardian angel which had always been strong got even stronger.
I hadn’t had much luck in love, and had never really been in love before. Of course, I had had my share of fun over the years and a few major infatuations - but nothing compared to the feelings I had for this man. At first, I didn’t understand why I felt the way I did - this certainty and knowingness that came from so deep within my soul. He was on my mind 24/7. I was consumed by him. There were many times I thought I was losing the plot, because apart from our first date he was doing nothing to encourage me. In fact he was pushing me away. Although I felt he did have strong feelings for me, and that was what was so frustrating. I had to find an outlet to express my feelings as the angst and frustration was taking its toll. My sister suggested that I should write down my feelings. I wasn’t very good at writing, but I thought… what the hell no one was going to see it - (little did I know…). I channelled my energy to the keyboard and started writing down my story of meeting my twin. To my surprise the words just poured out of me. I even started to think it could even be turned into a good little novel! I then started to receive messages from my angels telling me to write this book - “You have to write this book,” was what I kept hearing. I didn’t know why they were continually telling me to do this as I was NOT a writer and for a long time I did it ignore it. Well my angels knew better - as they always do. So with the help of an editor I ended up writing my story and I discovered that I did have a talent…a creative one. And It didn’t stop there. I also started to write lyrics to love songs (mostly about my twin of course), and to date have written over 40 songs. Many have received high acknowledgement in various worldwide competitions; one has even been selected for consideration for a top country artist which I “coincidently” wrote about in my book (page 341). A couple of other “surprising occurrences” have happened since I have written the book and I am hoping I have written my own reality! I am in the process of putting the finishing touches to the sequel MAKTUB: It is written - which should be out in the coming months.
I lost myself for a while in my twin but through losing myself - I also found myself. My twin has given me the greatest gift of all: ME. Maybe that was one of the reasons he came into my life, to help me to find my life’s purpose and become the woman I am today. If so, he has done his job, and I thank him from the bottom of my heart.
Even though my twin and I are still not together physically, he is forever with me on a soul level and I look forward to the day when we will meet again, in this life... or maybe another!
I decided to write a short blog of my thoughts on the voice of ego/fear vs. the voice of intuition/soul. It will be short because... it’s really very simple.
Ego/fear DOES NOT want you to be happy. Intuition/soul DOES.
It's a pretty clear message. We all need to listen MORE to our intuition/soul, and not to the negative voice of ego/fear which I call the voice of ‘doom’. I know it can be scary sometimes to trust your intuition/soul. Holy moly, what happens if it’s wrong! Well, from experience, I know if you learn to trust your intuition/soul, you can’t go wrong. It will never lead you up the garden path. Your ego will though!
The voice of ego/fear wants you to be unhappy; it thrives on you being depressed, negative, frightened, etc. It doesn’t want your light to shine, it wants to dull your light. Your ego/fear does not have your best interest at heart. Now, don’t get me wrong, we all need our ego, but a healthy balanced one. We also need to hear the voice of fear so it can alert us of impending dangers, or negative situations. However, when both are out of balance - so are we! Whenever I hear the voice of doom telling me I can’t; or I’m not good enough; fears of ‘what if scenario’s, start to freak me out, I tell it to ‘nick off’. I visualise myself pushing the voice down into the ground and stomping on it. It took a few attempts but eventually the loud ego/fear voice got quieter, and it’s now so much easier to hear the gentle, positive voice of my intuition/soul giving me the courage, confidence and strength to believe in myself, and to continue on my soul’s journey even if, at times, it doesn’t seem to make sense to me! Oh, of course the voice of doom won’t quieten without a fight - believe me! It still raises its ugly voice every so often - sometimes daily, and if it catches me at a vulnerable moment I will believe what I am hearing. It can throw me into a spin for a moment or two, but…you can’t keep an optimist negative for too long!
Practise does makes perfect, so learn to control the voice of doom. Just remember - it doesn’t want you to be happy. It doesn’t want your light to shine. Terrible thought isn’t it!
I know life can be challenging at times, and it’s not always easy. BUT it can be easier. Our thoughts really do create our reality so try to focus more on what you desire, and not on what you fear. Living in fear is not living. Choose to listen more to your intuition/soul – the voice of love. You will never be happier. Trust me.:)
I came across a great line about fear the other week which I thought said it all.
“Let me tell you about ego/fear…it’s the most boring thing about you.”